Read more about the article Raw Unadulterated Living

Raw Unadulterated Living

I have gone from living the (American) dream... good job, beautiful house, wonderful friends, two beloved cats, more stuff than we could ever want or need, plentiful money, gorgeous and loving husband - I wanted for nothingā€¦ and now I have nothing (except the husband of course šŸ˜œ Iā€™ve still got him thankfully). We have no home ā€“ not even a real base, we move from house sit to house sit every few weeks, new place, not knowing anyone, not knowing the area, living out of a hand luggage suitcase. No money to speak of ā€“ most people would be shock at how little we live on right now, no possessions - I literally mean it when I say all we have is a hand luggage suitcase each that fits all our stuff, no friends or people we hang out with (because of the said nomadic lifestyle) ā€“ just us two 24/7. Nothing really that we need or have to do, no purpose or meaning, no ambition and drive, no desires. And yet I'm the happiest Iā€™ve ever been. So happy I could cry sometimes with overflowing gratitude and love for life as it is. This lifestyle isnā€™t for everyone,…

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Read more about the article Two Years On…

Two Years On…

Itā€™s been almost two years since I had the Shaktipat Transmission that led to a massive awakening and fundamental shift in perspective and I just now feel like Iā€™m getting the hang of this groove - the groove that has no particular way of being in its expression, anything can and does show up in my experience of daily life. However to say that this doesnā€™t have some general overarching characteristics and themes isnā€™t to say the whole story. When I had the transmission the immediate aftermath and reaction was good - for about two weeks - joyfully experiencing, pervasive and expansive silence and insights into the nature of existence, the nature of life, were bountiful, it was like an excited child exploring its new world for the first time. Then the first wave of 'detox' from the personal small self came, it was as if that joyful inquisitive experiencing of the world turned bad, the mind ā€˜attackedā€™, doubts and questions of whys and hows were abound. My mind was trying to ā€˜get itā€™. Every concept, every word, every experience was questioned for its validity in my experience, so much so it became distressing. I remember the best advice that…

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Read more about the article Compassion of The Heart

Compassion of The Heart

Again and again life has recently been showing up with this question of what is compassion? What is love? Compassion can look like a lot of different things, but for the moment I wanted to talk about compassion for those around you that act in ways that you donā€™t understand, don’t like and donā€™t find their behaviour to be acceptable at all ā€“ maybe they’re behaving like a complete asshole.

The most compassionate thing you can do is not write them off. Bring them into your heart. Their asshole-ness is covering up a non-acceptance of Self in themselves. When you accept your whole Self, when you accept all that you are and all that you experience, all the ā€˜worldā€™, then you arenā€™t rejecting anything. You arenā€™t creating a sense of separation ā€“ all is you. So pull into your heart that someone, see that (more…)

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Read more about the article Just for a Moment

Just for a Moment

Keep letting go that dogged determination of seeking whether it be experiences and pleasure-seeking better and more ā€˜stuffā€™ vaster and deeper knowledge more experienced and valued skills let it all go just for a moment and experience this moment. Experience what it is to live life as awareness unadorned with the commentary of the mind theres nothing to get rid of, no bad thought all must be held in the tender embrace of acceptance for the real blossoming of life lived in truth and freedom to be recognised as your birthright all along.

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Awakening Is Not Like Baking A Cake

Itā€™s so easy to fall into the trap of thinking that you have to do XY&Z in order to realise the Selfā€¦. as if it's like a cake that you put all the exact ingredients in the bowl in the right order and put it in the oven and ping, you have yourself a perfect cake. Except it doesnā€™t work like that, that's the mindā€™s imaginings of what it is. What Iā€™m talking about is prior to the mind, and therefore canā€™t be grasped by the mind. Anything the mind thinks it knows or understands about this is just the mind imagining what it thinks. Itā€™s not an adding to, itā€™s not a changing of, its a realisation of that which you cannot NOT be, that which you already are, that which you always were, that which you always will be whether you realise it or not. Itā€™s like waking up from a dream; beforeā€¦ you were in the dream and you didnā€™t realise that you were dreaming, but you were. Then you wake up and realise it was a dream. It doesnā€™t change the dream, the dream is still there, playing out at it was, but you realise you…

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Read more about the article I Am

I Am

I donā€™t have any designs to be a teacher, or even a student, to be anything or anyone. I simply am. Living this life in the present moment of pure grace and spontaneity, meeting each and every moment with the fullness of my heart and the truth of this moment as I know it. Never is there anything to be rejected or avoided, never is there anything to be clung to and grasped; all is perfectly playing out on this stage of experiencing. For who am I that can possibly DO any of this, who could claim any ownership of this moment? What this isnā€™t is some spiritual pose, some ā€˜wayā€™ of being. This is just a description of what naturally happens when the dropping of all pretences, the dropping of any held view, the total openness of Sahaja, the natural state, when What-Is is.

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Read more about the article Looking with Childlike Wonder

Looking with Childlike Wonder

We tend put value judgements on what we want any given moment to look like, and so when the present moment doesnā€™t look like how we want then we seek to change it; we seek for the ā€˜goodā€™ to stay and the ā€˜badā€™ to go. This futile seeking to change the here and now causes immense suffering because life can look like anything.

And yet in reality good or bad it doesnā€™t matter, it all comes, it all goes, nothing stays around for very long. NOTHING. If we can sink into the reality of that for a moment we can see the futility of trying to hold on to anything; then the peace and sense of freedom that opens up in its wake is quite glorious. The physical feeling of tension and heaviness is lifted, the space of being right here right now is felt. Nothing to change, nothing to do, nothing to be. (more…)

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Read more about the article Embracing Life

Embracing Life

Look at the world as if you know nothing, donā€™t draw any conclusions about what you experience, or who you are. Ā  Innocently move through life experiencing what is without the burdens of ideas, judgements and conclusions. Ā  Take each moment a fresh, knowing that this moment will never be again. Ā  Lovingly embrace each experience of life, how lucky we are to have the play of life grace us with its beauty and light. Ā  Embrace all, reject nothing - see that you are the master of none but the father/mother of all.

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Read more about the article Personal ‘I’ vs Awareness ‘I’

Personal ‘I’ vs Awareness ‘I’

There’s an assumption that when I say “you are awareness/consciousness” that I’m talking of I-personal/ego/individual I/you. Firstly I want to clarify that when I speak of I/me/you in conjunction with awareness I’m talking of the non-personal ā€˜Iā€™ that is consciousness. That is awareness. The you (big Self, I-I) that ISĀ awareness-consciousness.

It seems to be common that when someone realizes that who they took themselves to be (the mind-body ā€˜Iā€™) is untrue, itā€™s seen that at the heart of experiencing there is nothingness/emptiness/awareness. This is true. But I urge you to not stop there, look/inquire deeper into this recognition.

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Read more about the article The Lion Roars

The Lion Roars

Wow I feel like a lion has been unleashed. This brutal honesty in service of truth that cuts with the precision of a well known blade is quite a surprise to me. This sharp intellect that can spar and duel with words unknown to me, spilling out like nobodies business. Thereā€™s still a tendency thatā€™s been around all my life ā€“ that when confronted with an assertion by someone, to shy away, to back down without even looking, to assume that they must be rightā€¦ "who am I after all? I know nothing." But Iā€™m finding this tendency more and more untenable. Thereā€™s a nauseating energy, I guess we would callĀ it adrenaline, that surges in me and so this hiding, this backing down from looking to my own experience doesnā€™t last. Itā€™s like I cannot NOT look to see if what is being said is true ā€“ no matter how much the tendency to hide from that looking still shows up. And so I find myself, for the first time in my life, facing full-faced to what life is showing me. Responding to the assertions of others, looking at the fabric of what they are saying. Andā€¦ well then the…

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Read more about the article Stand in Truth

Stand in Truth

I stand in truth. Can I accept that I may be judged, I may be questioned, I may be ridiculed? Can I accept that, can I be brave? Can I stand in my own truth, without qualification and explanation? Can I stand sure, knowing that itā€™s the right thing, itā€™s the only thing? Can I stand in truth, unashamedly without reason, and with no excuse? Can I stand up for mySelf, stand tall for the realisation of my very being? Can I stand up for the truth of my own reality that I know so well, so intimately? Can I live my life without the influence of shoulds and should nots? Can I say to hell with it all and be as I am? Can I stand in all my glory, warts and all, honest and vulnerable? Can I accept all of it, every aspect of me, every aspect of life, can I embrace it into my heart without exception? So I stand in my truth and in turn encourage others to stand in theirs. For itā€™s the most loving thing I can do for myself and others. Drop all the games, all the masks, all the pretences, all the…

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Read more about the article Living the Obvious

Living the Obvious

Life has become about living; living not in past regrets or future worries but life lived in this moment... None of the second guessing, the questioning, the ā€œis the right thing?ā€, or shoulds and should nots. The age old - before awakening, chop-wood-carry-water and after awakening, chop-wood-carry-water is so so true it's laughable. Being a seeker you imagine some different 'state' where everything will be beautiful and blissful ā€“ life will be perfect. Wellā€¦ life is perfect, but not in that way, perfect in that it IS. Itā€™s happening exactly as it is, nothing to do, nothing to change, nothing to be; even in amongst every imaginable phenomenal occurrence. Thatā€™s where the miracle of life is to be found, in the very ordinariness of existence. You are, and always have been exactly what you seek. You are the freedom that was/is always here, itā€™s only a matter of seeing through the trees of ā€˜personhoodā€™ to see that the ā€˜personā€™ that you take yourself to be is such an incredibly limited and narrow view of you. We take ourselves to be the body; the body that has changed, morphed and grown since birth, the body that will die. We take ourselves…

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Read more about the article The Attachment of Relationships

The Attachment of Relationships

The image of relationships and enlightenment don't normally go hand in hand.Ā The stereotyped image of the 'enlightened monk', shunning the material householder life is something thatā€™s been around in spiritual traditions for a long time. So out of this there comes the common misconception that you can't be in a relationship and be successful on the 'spiritual path'. But being in a relationship doesnā€™t necessarily mean that awakeningĀ canā€™t be there too. The relationship doesnā€™t have to go, only the attachment to the relationship has to go. Don't get me wrong, the result of that dropped attachment may actually be that the relationship ends. Ultimately thatā€™s what was meant to happen, and all attachments do eventually fall away - what's left is whatā€™s left, maybe the relationship will be there, maybe not. My own relationship hasĀ taught meĀ that relationships in themselves aren't some obstructive thing that stops you from realizing your own nature. Having said that, I lived through the oftenĀ painful dropping of the attachment to my relationship with my husband Martyn. We found ourselves at an impasse after he had a spiritual awakening that in the wake of he felt he could no longer be at the ashram where we were…

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Read more about the article This Suffering Will Pass

This Suffering Will Pass

I feel your pain, your suffering. If I could, I'd tell you that this will pass, just as the clouds pass in the sky, just as the ripples of the dropped stone disappear, just as the passing wind that rustles the tree leaves, just as the forgotten pain of yesterdays cut finger, just as the heartbreak of first loves breakup, just as the treasured childhood wellington's long outgrown, just as the wishes of birthday candles past. Donā€™t hold on,Ā for this too shall pass.

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Read more about the article Taste the Strawberry

Taste the Strawberry

I’m pretty much an open book these days, but Iā€™m not some kind of spiritual google that people can ask any amount of questions and I give them the answers. Someone on twitter recently asked me ā€œā€¦does that mean people have no individual purpose?ā€ A perfectly normal and unassuming question as questions go, but all of these questions, do they need to be answered? If you have the answer will it stop all questions, or will it just satisfy that particular question for a second then another one will fill itā€™s place? Is there a question that will end all questions? Is there an answer that will end all questions and answers? Will this cycle of questions and answers ever stop? Is there something in you that is nothing to do with questions and answers? (Wow, see how many questions I just asked there!!!) Throw out all questions, throw out all answers. They are just more of the same stuff, empty and meaningless. Keep quiet and see if any questions or answers come in this quietness of being. (more…)

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Read more about the article The Humanness of Existence

The Humanness of Existence

The utter humanness of existence cradles in it every possible emotion, sensation, feeling & thought. We canā€™t run from that, we canā€™t hide from that, we canā€™t avoid or resist that, and nor should we want to.

Itā€™s our human experiencing that reveals the ever-changingĀ world of perception that we live in ā€“ our ā€˜worldā€™ is constantly being born and reborn in every moment. Embrace this change, embrace it as the play and display of awareness-consciousness (you). This play is set on the stage of pure open, unconditioned and ineffable awareness-consciousness. (more…)

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Read more about the article Bliss Beyond the ā€˜Happiness Blissā€™

Bliss Beyond the ā€˜Happiness Blissā€™

This is not the bliss of happiness;Ā the fleeting bliss of phenomenal experience, that shows up when nothing is rocking the boat, the bliss that’s dependent on the content of life beingĀ wonderful. It’s something deeper,Ā something more fundamental,Ā something ever-present.Ā Itā€™s like an immovable mountain;Ā the very ground you walk on. It’s peaceful beyond the word peaceful.Ā It’s the very fabric of you.

I didn’t notice it much until now; there have been plentiful moments of the kind of happiness bliss that we all know about, both since this realizationĀ and throughout my whole life. But thisā€¦I’ve had hints of it, Iā€™ve sensed its unceasing presence; it’s completely without words that can describe it. The nearest thing I know to say is to use the word bliss, but it feels far more primordial than that word can grasp.
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Read more about the article You Are Aware

You Are Aware

You are the awareness thatā€™s witnessing the comings & goings of life. You have no qualities, no attributes other than you are aware ā€“ youā€™re not an object that can be described. Thereā€™s nothing that can show up that can disturb you - for youĀ just ARE.Ā Notice that you'reĀ observing even the thought or feeling of an 'I' that wantsĀ to identify what's showing up and why it's showing up. In this recognition youĀ realize that anything can show up, nothing canĀ be avoided or gotten rid of, life doesnā€™t need to ā€˜lookā€™ a certain way, because you are simply aware. You are that awareness, you have always been awareness, you cannot NOT be awareness, for you are aware. Notice that all that I say is not a prescription for something to do, rather is a description of how it is; you need no instruction or ā€˜practiceā€™ to be aware. And so you say ā€œbut itā€™s not always like thisā€, but it isā€¦ are you not always here, always aware? Do you-awareness need anything, does the feeling of peace, space, bliss or lack of thoughts need to be there in order for you to be aware? Are you not aware even when sadness or anger…

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Read more about the article Nothing More Than This

Nothing More Than This

There’s nothing more than this…. and yet people spend their lives convinced that they’re missing something, not getting something, not where they’re supposed to be, not doing what they’re supposed to be doing. Pretty much focused on everything BUT This, what IS, the present-moment experience.

There’s something in the mind that’s compelled to go with the seeking energy for that ‘greener grass’ over yonder. This constant looking/seeking motion that pulls your attention out of the very now is derivedĀ from the attachment to the idea of how life ‘should’ look. Ultimately this is where suffering shows up, where there’s aĀ disparity between how life should look, i.e. your expectations, and the reality of what is actually happening. But if for a moment you can set aside this seeking, this outward searching movement to fulfill expectations and desires, and look to your own experience prior to words and descriptions in this very moment ā€“ is there anything lacking here? (more…)

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Read more about the article Awareness

Awareness

No questions No answers No effort No doing No practice No deciding No letting go No coming No going No descriptions No disconnection No suffering No story No universe No god No you No me Awareness is aware

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Read more about the article Go Beyond the Qualities, to the Recognition of You

Go Beyond the Qualities, to the Recognition of You

When you experience an awakening ā€“ the recognition of the primordial nature of awareness, you’re centerless center; often what comes with it are thingsĀ such as relief, spaciousness, invincibility, freedom, fewĀ thoughts and even bliss. Itā€™s quite easy to then start identifying with those qualities asĀ something that has to be present to indicate your new found ‘awakening’.

This can lead you down the path of trouble, becauseĀ as youĀ go about your lifeĀ you’ll naturally start to bump into the different flavours of living, some nice and some not so nice. You might startĀ experiencing what you might call ‘afflictive thoughts’ or intense feelings & sensations. Maybe theĀ feeling of invincibility and spaciousness feels like it has lessened or disappeared.Ā This can lead you feel that you’ve lost ‘it’.Ā You then try all that you can think of to get back to those wonderful qualities that you experienced;Ā all the while trying to avoid the shitty thoughts and feelings that are coming up. (more…)

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Read more about the article The Solid Ground We Walk On

The Solid Ground We Walk On

We take the fleeting objects of our perception to be solid & persistent - even eternal, and we build our identity based on these beliefs. This illusion can work for a while, but at some point when we find that the ā€˜solidā€™ ground we walk is not so solid after all, we tend to hold on for fear of losing our identity, and in that we suffer. The belief that anything was ever solid was build on unexplored assumptions. Explore and recognise that at the heart of you, there is an emptiness from which all that you perceive arises.

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Read more about the article The Collision That Changed Everything

The Collision That Changed Everything

Two years ago today I collided with the Self, setting in motion the falling away of life as I thought I knew it to be.Ā  I was smacked over the head with the realisation that who I took ā€™Imogenā€™ to be was false. There was in fact no identifiable 'solid' form of Imogen that couldĀ be found. Itā€™s been quite a journey, a journey to realise that what I sought was always here, looking out at the unfolding of an apparent journey. Although I now see that that collision was ultimately a fleeting experience it was so dramatically felt that it changed everything. It changed my casual interest in spirituality into a search that left everything else in its wake. The abiding realisation of non-duality came about a year and half later. Itā€™s been a constant learning and discovering of what it looks like to move in this life as a passenger rather than believing the illusion that I'm the driver. Iā€™m still discovering the implications of this realisation and while all this may sound so far off and mystical, know that what Iā€™m pointing to is in fact your very nature and youā€™re never NOT this. Itā€™s just a matter…

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Read more about the article The Obsession with Understanding

The Obsession with Understanding

The obsessive need to understand enlightenment or anything for that matter, is the very thing thatā€™s stopping you from experiencing this present moment in its fullness. When resting in the present moment itā€™s seen that there’s nothing missing and no needs areĀ unmet; there’s no understanding that you need that could add or take away from what you essentially are.

You are that which sees everything, you are what is being sought. Thereā€™s no understanding that would bring about this realization. Understanding is only ever something that the mind ā€˜getsā€™. Thatā€™s not to say that some understanding might come; but you as consciousness are prior to any understanding. The understanding arises within you, not the other way around. You exist before any understanding. (more…)

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